So, today is a day where my darling little 11 month old is resisting his nap!! We've been out all morning and he's slept for maybe 25 minutes in the car waiting to pick up Mckenzie from school. 25 minutes! That's it! And it's certainly not long enough to not have a grouchy baby later.
So, I do what any good mother does, and I put him in bed because I know he's exhausted and needs the sleep.
You see, Parker is a good sleeper. Typically he reaches for his bed when he's tired. Most days I get no complaints out of him especially at bedtime. But for whatever reason, even though he's rubbing his sweet little eyes and yawning he will NOT go to sleep. Having a good sleeper is awesome, until they decide not to sleep. I don't know why, but it makes it that much more frustrating when they typically are compliant because you get used to having nap time to yourself and I had work to get done. But alas...he lays in his bed playing for a bit, which quickly turns to crying......then screaming for the remainder of the time. ARRGHHH
I go in and tend to him and calm him down, thinking if I rock him he will surely fall off into peaceful slumber and I can continue doing my extremely important work of studying for my woman's study group where we are learning to control our raw emotions(no irony there)....or....dishes.....or blogging.. C'mon Parker I'm a busy woman here and don't have time for your needy-ness! {shining mommy attitude for you right there, :)}
But wouldn't you know that as I sit and rock and rub his little head, he resists, he squirms, he kicks, he scratches...he basically does everything BUT sleep. I keep telling him he's exhausted and needs the sleep, that mommy knows best because we have a busy evening of Bible studies to teach and he wont get to bed on time. But his 11 month old self is not caring about my parental reasoning. He is NOT sleeping, and will RESIST at all cost.
As I sit in my rocking chair restraining a defiant little youngster. I start to think about God.
He's the ultimate Father figure. He the creator of everything, Master designer, writer of our destiny.
He surely has our best interests at heart right? I mean Jeremiah 29:11 tells us that He has great plans for us, plans to prosper us and give us a hope and a future.
But I wonder.... just as my little 11 month old is resisting my desire and instructions for him to sleep because I know it's good for him, do I, as a child of my heavenly father resist the leading and instructions of the Holy Spirit?
I know I have, I know I do. I don't think I do it intentionally, but sometimes I just get my way stuck in my mind and it's hard to change. It's hard to bend. It's hard to submit.
There are so many ways we resist doing what is right or good for us.
It's not good to hold a grudge...but sometimes it's just easier than forgiveness even though grudges poison us inside.
Or When a friend points out a flaw to us...it's easier to blow them off and get offended than it is to truly examine ourselves.
When we start to feel conviction about Tv shows we're watching, or books we're reading it's easier to justify why it's ok because "everyone else is doing it".
The list could go on and on.
It's easy to resist the correction of the Holy Spirit because it's often painful. It's often something we don't really want. It takes submission. It takes trust, and sometimes that's hard.
Unfortunately when we make the decision to resist what is best for us we pay a price. And in my case today, Parker and I BOTH will be paying that price later for his choices to not sleep today. :)
But it's a great reminder that my resistance also has consequences. Resisting God always has a price. Some choices are more costly than others.
And the same way that I will love and forgive and snuggle with my little fella again, so does our heavenly father extend grace to us as his beloved children.
I may have messy mommy moments where I mutter "If ya knew what was good for ya......"
But I am reminded that God could say the same thing for me. :)
{Humble Pie, officially served} :)
My Beautiful Mommy Mess turned into a beautiful teaching moment for mommy.
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